How to Network (on LinkedIn)
and how to don’t—a brief guide to respectful networking
To have the right contacts in your network can be incredibly helpful.
And this has been true long before LinkedIn became important.
I know coaches and consultants who have been active in the market for years, even decades, and who need no classic marketing or sales—because they have their network and get recommended.
LinkedIn has coincidentally become the hub where networking happens online. So that you too can build a valuable network that truly supports your business, here are a few tips on how to do it and how not to.
#1 Give, give, give—and take
I know we are on LinkedIn to grow our business and sell our services. That’s a simple truth. There’s nothing wrong with it. But it does make a difference how you approach potential clients. It can make them want to get in touch with you, or it can put them off.
We all know the situation:
You’re getting a new connection request
You accept it
You get pitched immediately
Nobody likes it (I bet you don’t either!). So why should your potential client?
#1 Nogo: Pitching your service straight away. Try helping first—for free
You can make a far better first impression if you offer help first for 0 euros.
What that help looks like may vary, but the important thing is to think carefully about what you can offer the person that’s actually helpful right now. It might be a useful podcast episode, an article, or even a short free consultation.
This is what I’ve already offered as help to contacts in my network (often via LinkedIn DM):
An entertaining podcast episode
A helpful Substack article
A free 1:1 LinkedIn consultation (30 minutes)
A free LinkedIn Storytelling Guide
A thoughtful comment on their LinkedIn post to help them gain more reach
The help you offer can take many different forms. What matters is that it’s tailored to what the person probably needs at that moment.
And if you’ve helped someone several times—and they truly appreciate it—that’s the best foundation for finally pitching your service. 😉
#2 Others want to sell, too. That’s okay.
From time to time I meet people who seem convinced that it’s only acceptable for them to sell their services. Yet when others do the same, they get all up in arms if someone dares to pitch them—as if selling weren’t one of the key reasons for being on LinkedIn.
It’s totally fine that we want to sell our services on LinkedIn. But in that case, we have to accept that there are other people on LinkedIn who also want to sell their products.
#2 Nogo: Don’t judge others for pitching—unless you’ve never sold anything yourself
That’s why I find it such a strange double standard when someone is on LinkedIn to build their own business, yet absolutely refuses to be pitched to themselves.
Let me tell you: networking is built on good business relationships. And that means that sometimes…
…you will be a client
…you will be service provider
…you will be a cooperation partner
for someone.
In my humble opinion, that’s what healthy networking looks like: sometimes you give, sometimes you take, and everything stays in balance.
But imbalance arises when someone only looks for their own advantage in networking. This happens when a person is happy to talk to you as a potential client, but immediately turns away when you want to grow your business.
And this is a behaviour I simply don’t understand. Because it makes no sense. And can even be harmful.
If you want to sell your stuff, you have to allow others the same. Even if you are a potential client. Very often business relationships go both ways: sometimes you are the service provider, sometimes you are the client. I have several relationships in business like that. You can’t just say: “If you come to me looking for a service provider, I’ll welcome you with open arms—because I know there’s money in it for me. But if you approach me with your service, I’ll dismiss you straight away.”
A concrete example: I’ve had contacts in my network who didn’t want to speak with me, out of fear I might pitch them. That’s okay. It’s their right. But it also means the relationship is, in a way, officially over.
The very same people later got in touch when they wanted to earn money. I had posted on LinkedIn that I was looking for coaches for a specific task, and among those who responded were exactly the ones who previously didn’t want to talk to me.
What I want to say is this: networking doesn’t work that way. It only works in the long run if we accept and respect that business goes in all directions—and that we can’t just focus on our own advantage. Which consistently means:
Be kind to ALL your contacts. They might one day become your clients.
#3 Stay open to everyone during offline networking
As valuable as LinkedIn networking is, showing up in person at an offline event can be even more rewarding. Meeting people face to face is still one of the best ways to connect (and afterwards you can always add them to your LinkedIn network 🤓).
It may sound simple, but there are a few pitfalls to avoid.
#3 Nogo: Don’t cherry-pick at an offline event
The most important point is this: don’t dismiss people you don’t think are worth talking to. Of course, if you meet someone who’s sympathetic and a great potential client—go for it! 🥳 But if you avoid speaking to people on purpose because you think they have “no business value”, that’s a no-go in my view.
I’ve seen this myself at offline events: people who first scan the room and decide, “Okay, who’s worth talking to?” Students and founders who are just starting out in self-employment are quickly ruled out, because they’re assumed to be “of no use”—in other words, unlikely to have a budget to spend.
And if they do, by chance, end up speaking to someone outside their target group, the put-on sales sparkle in their eyes quickly fades—and the conversation is wrapped up as quickly as possible.
For me personally, with the values I stand for, cherry-picking in networking is a no-go. I believe that everything we do comes back to us in some way. The person in front of us may not be the ideal client. But if we help them anyway, simply because we can, it will come back to us. Maybe they’ll recommend us, maybe they’ll know the ideal client we’ve been looking for.
Therefore: stay open. Even if the person doesn’t fit your target group, they might be the door to someone who does. The right opportunity could be just a few doors further on—but you’ll never know if you shut the first one.
And let’s be honest: it’s not always about opportunities. Even if those doors never open, it costs nothing to be a kind person.
Are you an investor, a serial entrepreneur or an established coach and would like to start on LinkedIn?
I’m here to help and guide you through the process of becoming visible on LinkedIn. Because the moment you become visible, you also open yourself up to new opportunities—from high-value client enquiries to new offers, and even the chance to shape a venture.
Send me a message and we'll find a solution for your LinkedIn presence.Click here to book a call with me or check out my service: